This past sunday God opened my eyes to my issues, all of them, so here is a page from my journal, as real and unfiltered as it gets.
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I read over this. Rolled my eyes and proceeded to watch 30Rock on Netflix...
This isn't what I signed up for. I signed up for wisdom and power, and rest, and confidence and miracles, oh boy did i sign up for miracles! I didn't sign up to be completely powerless, and constantly feeling hopeless. I sure as heck didn't sign up for feeling foolish all. the. time. I despise the feeling of being so completely out of control, that I am miserable. I didn't ask to be born, I'd much rather be... not born. I have so little confidence in God but have come to realize that he literally holds my life in his hands. *sigh*
This isn't what I signed up for. I signed up for wisdom and power, and rest, and confidence and miracles, oh boy did i sign up for miracles! I didn't sign up to be completely powerless, and constantly feeling hopeless. I sure as heck didn't sign up for feeling foolish all. the. time. I despise the feeling of being so completely out of control, that I am miserable. I didn't ask to be born, I'd much rather be... not born. I have so little confidence in God but have come to realize that he literally holds my life in his hands. *sigh*
He literally holds my life in his hands.
We hear this and say this so much that we become desensitized, to the reality of what this means.
It hit me like a ton of cedar blocks.
I finally figured out my problem with prayer, I figured out everyone's problem with everything.
Seriously, I might have brought light to the greatest fallacy plaguing, not only our generation but the body of christ as a whole.
The end.
signed, Jesi Rae, Esquire.
Lol! Gotcha!
For the conclusion to this inadvertent series tune in monday!
You’re not helpless; you’re powerful. I think the key is asking God what would he have you to do, then consciously make an effort to spread love. That is why we’re here isn’t it? I don’t believe we’re here to simply proclaim that we love Jesus, Buddha, or whoever it is that we identify with, but to act on what they taught. So it’s in realizing that you’re powerful that allows things to happen. We’re co-creators with God. Life isn’t happening to us, we’re happening to life. Every thought that you have creates some effect. It’s in perceiving that you’re hopeless, that life seems stagnant. We’ll probably never figure out the exacts of how this life works, but I think that’s the beauty of it. Go with the flow of good and good will come to you. Great post!
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